- I am 42.
- I am overweight.
- I have varicose veins.
- I have slightly crooked teeth.
I have a few bodily problems, I’ll admit. The old chassis could use some work, but it gets me where I need to be and is very dependable.
One thing I thought was problem free were my feet.
Sure they are a tad on the large side. But they’re not clown feet! Yes, they get a bit stinky, but only when I go without socks.
So here I was, feeling good about my feet.
That is until Kathleen arrived.
It was the night of the SnB. A dark and stormy night. I think I saw shadow cross the moon when Kathleen pulled up in her mini-van.
As an aside, are you aware that Kathleen is young? Young and Lovely? that she looks kind of dewy and fresh? And now she has that great new haircut, she looks fashionable too??
You would think she would have stopped with the cake plate fiasco. I know I would have! (Yes, I have met Kathleen’s mother Sue. Sue is a lovely woman – I don’t know where she went wrong.)
No, Kathleen did not stop with the glass dome – she was not content until she shattered my foot self confidence too!
I was knitting away on my Spearfish and coming close to the toe decreases for the first sock. This led to a general discussion of the best spot to start those decreases.
I said that the best spot was right where your foot turns in.
Kathleen said, "Yeah, make a left at the bunion." and then she cackled. I swear to God.
I said, "whatareya talking about? I don’t have bunions!!"
She said, "Like hell you don’t".
I said, "everyone has that — it’s a bone – it’s a toe bone!"
Whereupon, she whips out her pale and lovely foot.
She has no toe bones.
::sob::
I guess I do have bunions.
But on the bright side, I have a very handy (no pun intended!) marker for the best place to start sock decreases!
purlingswine 
