A friend sent me the following quote. I don’t know who said it, but I am glad they did! I call it The Flume of Life:
“Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of
arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but
rather to skid in sideways, cigar in one hand, favorite beverage
in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and
screaming WOO HOO . . . What a Ride!”
arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but
rather to skid in sideways, cigar in one hand, favorite beverage
in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and
screaming WOO HOO . . . What a Ride!”
purlingswine 
I always said I was going to hell in a handbasket and they just don’t make ’em in my size yet but I like yours better. Although I have a new theory on life…want to hear it? About two weeks ago a made a smooth move around a school bus doing its required hesitation at railroad tracks without any harm or cut off to anyone when the car behind me “flipped me the bird”. That didn’t surprise me as much with today’s loonies on the road and I clearly did nothing wrong. I was a smooth operator. HOWEVER, the occupants were two fully-habited nuns that had seen a few popes in their day….AND NO, it wasn’t halloween and it was 8:30 in the morning. My hubby says I am damned!! I say…we are all currently living in hell. We go to our place of worship as a sanctuary of the wonderful place we can be and then kick us to the curb after an hour and say “wait your turn. Deal with it.” Theology according to Carol………Of course these things only happen to me, or do they??
That’s gotta be Dorothy Parker… or maybe Oscar Wilde. Either way, it’s great.
And I have to comment on a comment – what I wouldn’t give to be flipped off by nuns. How frightening/cool is that!
I don’t know why my “theology theory” did not include my name, but t’was me. The Damned One.